As a dude with sub fantasies, I eat ass. Theres something about it that turns me on so hard, like, its the ultimate debasement in some sort. Damn that made me hot.

It was some pretty cheap bbguns (not actual replicas for hardcore players), but I would usually shoot it at grass or something like that, I'm not entirely stupid, I know that anything that goes up will go down :D (which is why I don't believe in that 'moon landing bs, where did the rocket go man, they think they can fool us)
EDIT : that last sentence is sarcasm.

Even if you don't know that, like, how dumb are you to TRY that ? Hell, I've made that joke with BBguns, and even then I would ALWAYS fire 3/4 times in the air to make sure the chamber was empty. How moronic do you have to try that with a real gun, let alone without checking by shooting the air first.

You make a point, but I could also argue that you feel that way because you are in an environment where guns are a thing.
I'm a french guys, 21yo, and never in my life have I encountered a gun (aside from those carried by police officers / army (in trainstations and shit)). So I don't feel the need AT ALL to know how to handle a gun, since (and I'm not joking here), I have a VERY HIGH chance of cruising through life without ever touching one.
Obviously, if I wanted to use one (say I wanted to hunt, or for some reason I would go to a shooting range) then I would need to be taught how to handle them safely, but thats highly unlikely.

Yeah but I mean, plants aren't as good as lobster, so I would specifically go out of my way and eat that lobster.

Right, but thats like, a newbie virus that would get spotted by fucking norton.

yeah but the footfetish prince will be way less likely to notice you.

Well, I have nothing against this meme, I don't believe in the stories more if it isn't here, but "it doesn't have to be believable it just has to sound fun" seems like a pretty good description of a joke, which would fit just right on a humor website.

brooklyn nine nine.
Centered around cops, but its much more comedy than police oriented (basically the cases are secondary, unlike in shit like NCIS)

Intentionnally ? Someone with problems.
Non intentionally someone who fucked up cooking their meat or w/e healthcode violation you might have at home :)

Doritos isn't perfume mate.

How do you keep something airfull without it being airtight? Also, the "air" is here for the protection of your chips.

Okay, but you are thinking like a well intended person. You can't do that. The reasons behind anything being forbiden ever is always the answer to "what would an asshole do".
In this case, an asshole could give out food that is not safe for consumming, that would make people sick / kill them. The reason for the permit is you need to follow a certain amount of rules to ensure the food you give is safe.

I think this implies more than just being able to speak to someone in another language, its doing so without effort.
Tipically : you don't feel the need to translate what is said to you to your mother tongue to understand it, you process it right in the language.

Okay, lets be honnest, creepy or not, sassy was kind of asking for it. I mean, this is the internet, you can't just go "would semen do ____ to me" and not expect someone to give you a chance of finding out on your own.
Hell, if one of my friends said something like that in real life, I would make the same joke.

She has a van, distance is not a problem, didn't you read her description?

Thats why we invented 4G. Also, nothing "forces" you to watch that video.

He probably has an F. Instead of changing it to an A+, which is easily noticeable, he changed it to a C, which is still a passing grade, and more plausible.
The "instead" refers to earlier attempts where he changed his grades.

Its not even irony. Maybe if it was something like "the headquarters for the department of coal energy", but thats a museum, museum are for old shit, so they acknowledge coal is old news.