The invite should start with "Lettuce all meet..."

If owls bring Hogwarts acceptance letters, what the hell do these guys bring?

*ukelele starts playing*
"Uuuuuuuuuu...."

Asshole Aaron

Genius!!!

I don't know, can you?

My mom used to come into my room open all the widows so it would be cold and then take my covers and leave the room with them. I usually assumed a highly compact foetal position and try to cover myself with the pillows. It was horrible, but it worked for a while. That is until she started letting the cat in my room. And let me tell you, that little motherfucker would sit in the middle of the goddamn room staring at you while meowing like there was no tomorrow. Not wanting to give up the sweetest last minutes of sleep i would throw pillows at that little fucker until i was left there cold and bitter, without covers or pillows, and a screaming psycho who feasted upon my misfortune. That is when i would usually got up and started my day.
Damn! I sure miss my cat :(

deloreoreorean?

Every rose has its thorn - Poison

Harry Potter and Frodo?

That moment when you read the comments and you feel old as shit

Hang him