So…. This isn’t a parents thing. We are almost all very bad at this.
Picture the most affluent child on earth. They literally have been around the world, anything they want. Private concert of the hottest artist for their birthday? Sure. First car is a Lambo or whatever else? Sure. And it is their birthday, and they asked for socks woven with human hairs from female monks renowned for their hair care, interwoven with graphene and platinum threads and dyed with dodo bird blood- requiring the dodo to be cloned back from extinction. And they don’t get them.
That is the greatest disappointment they’ve ever felt in their lives. What was yours? Death? Loss? Divorce? Rejection? Not getting into a school or getting a job? Betrayal? Starvation?
Well- them not getting their socks is emotionally the same to them as when they told you your baby didn’t make it after delivery.
If that is the greatest pain you’ve ever known, this is the greatest pain they’ve ever known.
If that was your first time dealing with that sort of grief, this is their first time dealing with that sort of grief. Perhaps any grief at all.
So… how sorry would you feel for some rich person who didn’t get their way on some unreasonably extravagant or superficial thing? Does your heart bleed? Do you say a prayer every night that some Beverly Hills Debutant gets Drake for her sweet 16 and gets the dress she wants from Paris in time for the party and Becky Klinsman doesn’t have a nicer dress?
Probably not. You might even laugh and mock. Because… of course. They are being a brat. It isn’t really a big deal in the grand picture is it? It isn’t life or death, they have things so good and you and billions of others would gladly trade them circumstances in a heart bear wouldn’t you?
Now, realize this- almost every single person in America- yes. Even the “poor ones” lives within the top 1% of the global population for wealth and standard of living. Just by existing in a developed country you are more affluent than like 6 billion people.
Less than 20% of the global population will ever take a plane flight. If you’ve flown more than once in your life you have exponentially beat out most of the humans on earth.
In a developed nation, your shitty life, no matter how shitty, most likely places you in a position where no less than 5 billion people do not have have you have. Where billions would gladly trade for what you have or even sacrifice or risk everything for a piece of it.
So in that sense- things that upset us often are childish and entitled. In that sense, if you were being cognizant of what you have and your position you’d likely tell someone else who was the 1% relative to you- “shut up.”
So there is a strong hypocrisy there in that we generally
will see our problems as serious and valid regardless of other peoples, and see other peoples as less valid in light of our own.
That said- of course you can be upset or disappointed or depressed regardless of how rich or well off or loved or successful or fulfilled etc. you are.
Rich and famous people self destruct or kill themselves over emotional issues all the time.
You’re human. So wether it is extinct animal socks or your closest loved one dying or being rejected by a crush or whatever- hurt is hurt.
We all feel it. Some of us can hide it better or function through more or let it go faster depending on the type of hurt but we all can be hurt.
Depression- clinical depression- is something different and has nothing to do with circumstances or anything else inherently. External factors can trigger or worsen or help cope through clinical depression but it is an internal chemistry issue.
It can strike anyone at any time and can’t simply and universally be “willed away” or “got over.” It’s an illness and depending on the individual and severity and other factors, like any other illness, can require profesional help, medication, lifestyle changes and other treatments, support, and time and may be chronic, have remissions and flares, or be temporary.
There is a lesson in here about being kinder to others. How you felt or feel when you come out about your feelings and are dismissed Can be equated to how it might make others feel. You probably do have things pretty well. Almost anyone able to read this has things pretty well over all restively both in the modern world as well as in context to all humans across recorded history. You can still have negative emotions and become sad or depressed. It is nice if people can be more sensitive to our feelings but we can’t make them, what we can do is make it a point to be more sensitive and understanding of others.
Picture the most affluent child on earth. They literally have been around the world, anything they want. Private concert of the hottest artist for their birthday? Sure. First car is a Lambo or whatever else? Sure. And it is their birthday, and they asked for socks woven with human hairs from female monks renowned for their hair care, interwoven with graphene and platinum threads and dyed with dodo bird blood- requiring the dodo to be cloned back from extinction. And they don’t get them.
That is the greatest disappointment they’ve ever felt in their lives. What was yours? Death? Loss? Divorce? Rejection? Not getting into a school or getting a job? Betrayal? Starvation?
Well- them not getting their socks is emotionally the same to them as when they told you your baby didn’t make it after delivery.
If that is the greatest pain you’ve ever known, this is the greatest pain they’ve ever known.
So… how sorry would you feel for some rich person who didn’t get their way on some unreasonably extravagant or superficial thing? Does your heart bleed? Do you say a prayer every night that some Beverly Hills Debutant gets Drake for her sweet 16 and gets the dress she wants from Paris in time for the party and Becky Klinsman doesn’t have a nicer dress?
Less than 20% of the global population will ever take a plane flight. If you’ve flown more than once in your life you have exponentially beat out most of the humans on earth.
In a developed nation, your shitty life, no matter how shitty, most likely places you in a position where no less than 5 billion people do not have have you have. Where billions would gladly trade for what you have or even sacrifice or risk everything for a piece of it.
So in that sense- things that upset us often are childish and entitled. In that sense, if you were being cognizant of what you have and your position you’d likely tell someone else who was the 1% relative to you- “shut up.”
So there is a strong hypocrisy there in that we generally
That said- of course you can be upset or disappointed or depressed regardless of how rich or well off or loved or successful or fulfilled etc. you are.
You’re human. So wether it is extinct animal socks or your closest loved one dying or being rejected by a crush or whatever- hurt is hurt.
We all feel it. Some of us can hide it better or function through more or let it go faster depending on the type of hurt but we all can be hurt.
It can strike anyone at any time and can’t simply and universally be “willed away” or “got over.” It’s an illness and depending on the individual and severity and other factors, like any other illness, can require profesional help, medication, lifestyle changes and other treatments, support, and time and may be chronic, have remissions and flares, or be temporary.