Killer title

Horrifying and adorable

I'm making a new religion, it's called The Not Kid Fuckers. If you fuck children and/or young goats, you are burned to death. Meetings are all the time, everywhere. We worship Greg, my older brother, because he's never fucked anyone ever.

Thank You For Coming

I'm glad they highlighted the joke, otherwise I would've gotten lost in all the other words

Because their wealth isn't partially connected to their ability to follow trends and market clothing brands

I mean, when I was stabbed I had to bleed on the doctor a bit specifically so that she could help heal me, so sometimes you have to bleed on others to heal? I guess?

I was born yes I was yes I was yes I was

Sometimes that's all you need. Happy birthday!

...Yes? Honestly, that's all of my friends

I'm gonna have to do this at some point.

A+

Cause they have therapists

You’re under arrest. We’ve got your IP number and are closing in on your position. Time to make your peace with God you sick bastard

Wholesome

What was the loophole?

I liked it, but I've been told that that isn't an indication of whether something is good or not.