It’s Rihanna’s favorite fruit, an Onana

But isn’t foam art like that cold by the time you get it?

What do you mean ‘get a job to pay for being born’??

Supremely creepy but not illegal to shag a 17 year old.

Yes, doctor, hi, I feel like I could be dying faster?

Yes, doctor, hi, I feel like I could be dying faster?

I did one of these and what they don’t mention is that it tickles. It tickles like a MoFo. Keeping it on for the required time is not easy.

I saw an Aussie housing programme and the prices they ask (and get) for basically a large shed in an old prison colony is in-sane. 1.5 mil Australian dollars for three bedrooms, one and a half baths and two lumps of grass... Nuts!

I saw an Aussie housing programme and the prices they ask (and get) for basically a large shed in an old prison colony is in-sane. 1.5 mil Australian dollars for three bedrooms, one and a half baths and two lumps of grass... Nuts!

If Youtube taught us anything, it’s that those are really mashed potatoes.

Ronald Weasley! Is that Siriusly for the ‘gram?

** Ray took over McDonals in a not-cool-dude way.

Sing this to the tune of Rhinestone Cowboy

I heard that the vasectomy is not nearly fool-proof, can be extremely painful and can take a looong time to heal. As a woman, considering this and having asked my doctors, I’ll be going for the tubal.

Amazing how they managed to sink any ships that way...

Black don’t crack but yellow stays mellow...?

I said Patrick but I have no Patrick. Lies!

But mr Depp, that did not work out well for you...

Taylor Swift, is that you?

I just looked at the first one and said 'ooh hello...ki' and snorted

If you spill any more beans, consider yourself toast.

I own it, buy it off me because I'm broke and have no enemies left.