Sock sock croc croc for me.

Whoever finishes first is doing the dishes.

Who knew the dining table could fit us all?

I want to kiss you too.

But you've only got a little ass.

Getting an Uber home at 4:30am when the sun's just coming up.

Son, she said. Have I got a little story for you...
Pearl Jam. Alive.

That's a dick move, Brianna. Get over yourself.

https://youtu.be/uF7vghzj6pk

That'll do pig, that'll do.

Imagine a stare-off between the horse and that unimpressed shark!

I don't know you but I'm impressed. I've lost 15kg since May n feeling so much better for it. Your achievements look even greater than that and I just wanna be a random stranger on the internet that acknowledges your efforts.

My family's faces when I tell another terrible Dad joke.

This cow lives 30 miles from me!

Oooooooh. That took me a while!

I love Freddie for dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyzzzz!!

I like it.